Does your son/daughter/adolescent show a spark of interest and motivation in a particular area? Does he or she find aspects of school unsatisfying? Is there an insatiable curiosity that you're not sure how to address? If these questions describe your son/daughter/adolescent, he or she may benefit from a Mentorship - an academic mentoring experience that pairs a student with a professional in the student's field of interest. The opportunity to pursue interests outside of the classroom can produce remarkable results for young people, both academically and personally.
Things to keep in mind when your son or daughter is seeking a mentoring experience
- Successful academic mentoring experiences are goal-driven
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- A mentoring experience will be most beneficial and most productive if it is focused on a project. This gives the relationship direction and a tangible goal to work toward.
- Each party has a specific role
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- The role of the mentor is to provide direction and advice on completing the project.
- Your son or daughter's role is to
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- establish the relationship
- make a conscious effort to learn as much as possible
- have a plan for the partnership and how to complete the project
- meet the deadlines for the project
- ask questions and propose solutions
- Your role as parent is to supervisor your son/daughter's interaction with his/her mentor and to provide support as needed.
Six Steps to Establish an Effective Mentorship
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Assist your son or daughter in determining his or her readiness
- An academic mentoring experience that works takes work. If your son or daughter is unwilling to put in the effort to find and establish contact with a mentor, this type of relationship is probably not appropriate right now.
- Before pursuing an academic mentoring experience, it's important to have a family meeting to discuss commitment levels. Setting guidelines in relation to time and money up front will alleviate disappointment later. For example, one of the biggest issues is often transportation. Unless your son or daughter has a driver's license and a car, or ready access to safe public transportation, there is likely to be a time-consuming transportation commitment from you. Establishing how many hours per week your son or daughter has to devote to a mentoring experience is also critical. We recommend coming up with a plan for handling stress and conflicting responsibilities before they arise.
- Be ready to make the same commitment to your son or daughter's mentor that he or she is making to your son or daughter. Research suggests that the most beneficial partnerships last for six months to a year. That's a long time, so consider whether this is something all of you plan to finish before you start.
- Now is also the time for you to determine what level of contact you feel is appropriate for your son or daughter to have with his or her mentor. You may not be comfortable with unsupervised visits to the mentor's home or office, and although this may not be an issue after the relationship is established, take time to discuss this up front with your son or daughter. Guidelines for tele-mentoring relationships should also be established.
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Determine in what area your son or daughter would like to pursue an academic mentoring experience
- Help your son or daughter explore what his or her interests are and what he or she hopes to accomplish through the academic mentoring experience.
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Assist your son or daughter in Researching potential mentors
- Professional organizations, universities, religious organizations and community groups are all good sources for potential mentors. Contacts you have may also be helpful. Even if your friends, acquaintances or professional contacts are not the right fit, they may have suggestions for you.
- An effective mentor will share your son or daughter's interests. Make sure your son or daughter does his or her homework to find out what potential mentors are working on and how their interests mirror your son or daughter's.
- Professional organizations, universities, religious organizations and community groups are all good sources for potential mentors. There are several organizations facilitate the mentoring process by helping students find appropriate mentors.
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- The Davidson Institute for Talent Development
- National Mentoring Partnership
- iMentor
- The Mentoring Group
If your son or daughter cannot find a local mentor, he or she may want to consider a distance mentoring experience. The International Telementor Program may be a helpful resource.
- Let your son or daughter make the contacts
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- Although you should support your son or daughter's efforts, it is still his or her responsibility to form the relationship. Your son or daughter's commitment at this stage will reflect his or her interest in the whole process.
- Assist your son or daughter by proofreading initial contact letters or emails to the potential mentor.
- Encourage your son or daughter to keep a log of all contacts made and any actions associated with them. This will help clarify communications along the way and minimize misunderstandings in the process.
- Participate in the Interview Process
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Once your son or daughter has found a potential mentor, arrange a face-to-face or telephone interview. Allow your son or daughter to take the lead in the call, but be prepared to ask questions about supervision, safety, intellectual property rights, etc.
If the interview does not go well, it is likely your son or daughter will be disappointed. Help him or her to understand that it's not easy to find a good match and encourage him or her to keep trying.
- Follow your son or daughter's lead
If the interview goes well, encourage your son or daughter to jump in with both feet. You may wish to preview the "Tips for forming a learning partnership" to best determine how to support your son or daughter as they begin their mentoring adventure.
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